It’s time for people to open their eyes to behavioural problems in children.
Children, regardless of gender, are a nightmare. From cradle to grave, they all have their little quirks, ticks, likes, dislikes and MUST HAVE’s. You know the old ‘I’ll DIE without <insert favourite thing here>’ lien they feed to you.
But then you have the problem of those that are damaged, and the thing with the brain is, once it is damaged, it can never be repaired. You can try to patch it up, and you can try to make over a lot of it, but underneath everything, that scar will always be there.
Children aren’t born inherently bad. Nor are they born saints and saviours. Even Jesus must have had the odd teenage tantrum! You learn what you live.
Kids are actually very similar to puppies. You show them aggression they learn to fight, you show them love, they learn to love in return.
I don’t deny that mental health and behavioural problems exist, but far too many parents try to lay the blame on any learning difficulty they can. Autism, ADHD, ADD. Anything to lay blame on something else, other than their own home environment.
I’m not saying we should go all Charles Dickens on their ass, but the fine line between discipline and abuse, and discipline and lenience needs to be established. For example;
My niece (she was 4) nearly got herself killed by running into the road, in front of a 184 bus. My sister gave her a slap on the hand. That was human instinct at its finest, and had anyone else done it, I’d have shook their hand.
Had she beaten her black and blue, THEN I’d have been the first to step in and remove my niece from the situation. That is the difference between discipline and physical abuse.
Kids, and adults, need discipline, especially when it comes to the teenage years. Learning about boundaries and what is and isn’t acceptable, and that everything we do has repercussions, good and bad.
There is nothing wrong with being a maverick, I made a living out of it, being a breath of fresh air in a salon that was so stuck in its ways we had clients dying of old age quicker than we had new clients coming in.
But I understood the boundaries and expectations and stayed (only just) within them. There was the odd time I went in to work hungover after a bank holiday, but who hasn’t? There was also the time I ditched my usual suit, tie and bowler hat for skinny fit jeans, ripped teeshirt and tartan waistcoat. Against protocol (we literally looked like undertakers), but it made me a trendy, edgy member of staff that people liked. Against the rules, but some rules are made to be broken. I didn’t blame it on my own Asperger, I blamed it on the fact I didn’t want to wear a suit.
To understand others behaviour, we need to put the shoe on the other foot.
How would YOU behave in their situation?