A 12-year-old boy has ‘come out’, excuse the pun and lifted the lid on what it’s really like to have same sex parents. And guess what, his experience is positive, like 99% of all adoptees, myself included.
He was taken from his birth parents when he was only a toddler due to them neglecting him, with police finding him alone in a room in ‘very poor’ condition. From here on out, he would be fostered until a permanent family came along, which they did in the shape of 2 guys.
Now unless an adoption is like mine, where everything was meticulously planned, and contracts drawn up not long after conception, you don’t really know what to expect from your new family. They could be black, white, mixed race, millionaires or blue-collar workers. Have kids of their own, Gay, Straight, Single. It literally is a lucky dip. You’re lucky to get something, but you don’t know what it is until you pull it out.
Now before you all start giving me the Man and Woman retort, trust, it’s old and outdated. Plus, in every relationship, my own included, we take on the tasks we are good at. I’m more nurturing than my other half, but he’s better at manual things like Electrics. I cook, he incinerates! Every couple the world over fits together because we have strengths in opposite ends of the fields.
So would two guys or two girls adopting a child be any different to how a child is raised, because lord knows, there can be challenges along the way. Firstly, it’s a resounding no. The child will grow and learn and go to school like every other child. But there is a bonus to being part of a ‘minority’ family, and that is that they will see a much broader spectrum of relationships and it will be seen as normal.
Scared that a boy is going to be put in a dress and forced to learn every song Cher has released since 1965? Not all gay men are obsessed with drag, Cher or being ‘Fabulous’.
Worried the little girl with pigtails will suddenly wake up with a crew cut, flannel shirt and dungarees and want to become a car mechanic? Again, not all lesbians fit that stereotype either. Though both stereotypes do exist, not everyone fits that clichéd mould.
Also, being exposed to same sex relationships, especially in the teenage years can be exceptionally healthy and informative for all sorts, from Sex Education (which is sadly lacking in schools), to STI’s (gay men tend to be much more in the know than our heterosexual counterparts).
There’s also the fact the child will have a better knowledge of history and persecution, from 1900 onwards, be it black people, concentration camps, the criminalization of homosexuality, literary greats, musicians. Quite frankly, their history, and knowledge of history will be much broader because it’s not been whitewashed (I only found out about the pink triangle in concentration camps after leaving school, because that bit of history was edited out).